Peanut Butter.

iYo!

So a couple of weeks ago we did Metro Ministries—a Ministry on wheels for kiddos! Yay!

We went into the second most dangerous neighborhood in San Jose, a spot where they have been going for three years now. The neighborhood was along this little ally way..and Scott (the director) hasn’t been in Costa for a year and when the families and kids saw him they were filled such joy to see his face. It was so awesome to see the love that they had for him. As we we were walking around to gather the kids for the little service I was just thanking God for giving me a roof over my house, clean water, money to buy the ‘finer things in life’ and my life in America in general. 

It was amazing to see how happy these kids were with so little....It really put things in perspective for me (but I’ve just scratched the surface with this feeling).

After Metro, Some of us went down town to enjoy a free day---YES! We went to EL Patio, a snazzy little place with awesome cappuccinos- YUM...Then walked around a little market place, got some bread, some chicken, and headed home. I definitely needed a day like this J

 So it is going on my fourth week here in San Jose and it feels like I have been here forever (in a good and bad way). Last week was inner healing and let me tell you was it ever. I had no idea that the things I struggled with were still very constant in my life. God really showed me all the things that needed healing. Such things were events in my childhood, high school, college and even things I needed to come clean and repent to in weeks before coming to YWAM. It was a beautiful time of releasing resentment, anger, impurity, sins, and most importantly a life that was not living for God. After confessing in the ‘hot seat’ in front of my DTS family, something definitely changed in me. The world didn’t stop turning, but I did have a feeling that I have never had before and that was pure freedom. I was free from all the pressures that I had put on myself, free from the burdens of my mistakes, free from giving forgiveness to those who have hurt me, and free to be the person that God had called me to be. By Jesus dying on the cross for me (all of us) he also died for all our worry, guilty, shame, anxiety, troubles, etc....and by releasing all those strongholds that the enemy has been whispering to me all my life, to confess out loud whatever was heavy on my heart was an incredible feeling. After doing that I was surrounded by this love that I had never felt before. It gave me a feeling of freedom, of 
chains being broken, an exciting, exciting feeling!

That night we had a bon fire to commence the entire DTS inner healing. We had to write on a piece of paper all the things we wanted to get rid off—‘our junk’: Its funny because when I started scribbling on this page of everything I could think of that I wanted out of my life, I didn’t notice that in a different marker I had written ‘old Montana’...Neat aye?!

Words cant describe the confidence that I have in Christ. I no longer worry about my future, my career, my life in general because I know that my God will never leave me and will guide me every step of the way. I am finally experiencing what it is to be ‘created in his image’. God has given me worthiness, love, happiness, joy, comfort and above all else inner peace.

AND to top it all off I received a package from my Mom today. I cant tell you what happiness her package brought me. Granted it was 45.00 to ship, but the items in there were priceless, thoughtful things that only My Mom could send and it would mean so much. It is miraculous how God always speaks directly through her to me. She always knows before I even have to ask---especially the Peanut Butter...and I bet your wondering why my blog title is ‘Peanut Butter’ huh? Welp, I always like to think of nifty little titles for these writings and Peanut Butter was all I could think of and for this reason: Costa Rica is my peanut butter, I know--Let me explain to those that dont know me very well... I absolutely LOVE PB.The different varieties, the saltyness, the sweetness, the crunchiness, too much is always a bad thing, but too little is never enough. It is like Costa in these ways: the variety of people, the sometimes saltyness of community living with sharing showers with 30 girls and the smallest toilet space ever, the sweetness of growing my intimate relationship with Jesus, the crunchiness is the rawness of it all, sometimes I am so overwhelmed with happiness and love that it is almost too much, and lastly, I can never ever get enough of God on this base. So there ya have it—Costa Rica is Montana's Peanut Butter.

Peace.